today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket
today on satan makes a blog post
Nintendo DS’s law is the observation that, as soon as you finally decide on and buy a DS, Nintendo will come out with a new and better model that you want more.
"The only consistent theme linking my actions together is that none of them, not a one, advance the game in any meaningful way."
“I’ll harvest every fucking cabbage in this field before I so much as glance at…
my little cousin got bit by a house spider and she was crying so i went to get some stuff to soothe and numb it but before i could even walk out the door i heard her quietly whisper ‘i can’t handle the responsibility of being spiderman’